Fear can be so consuming sometimes, can't it? Last Wed. I started bleeding and had no idea what the cause of it could be. It still had not stopped Sunday, so I made an appointment yesterday and got to have a sono to see the baby. The doctor found I had a blood clot inside the sac where the baby is growing 2 1/2 inches wide. Of course the sono made it appear enormous! I am supposed to take it easy for awhile until the clot goes away. The good news is, I get to have lots of sonograms, and I may even find out what I am having a week from Friday!
Fear still creeps in though, and I know it's not from God. I often look at the internet hoping to find comfort in things like this; and I never do! I looked on Baby Center and found a few moms who said they lost their baby with a similiar condition. Not the news I want to hear! I know their story is not mine, and the chances are this baby is going to be fine, but fear is still there.
Yesterday when we got to see the baby, I had a little voice in my head saying, "Don't get too attached to the baby." I know that thought was from Satan, but I still hate that I had that thought at all. In Isaiah 41:10, I am reminded that God is with me. "So do not fear, for I am with you;do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand." God has a life planned out for this baby, and my fear is not going to change anything. God is with me, and he is with this baby, and there is nothing more comforting than that! However, if you are reading this, please say a little prayer for Baby Cox!
